HOW TO REBUILD TRUST AFTER CHEATING | TRUST IN RELATIONSHIPS, TRUST IN YOURSELF, AND TRUST IN LIFE

Ever found yourself questioning all your relationships (and yourself) after being cheated on? If so, join me on this episode of The Femme Cast, as I dive deep into the messy journey of rebuilding trust after infidelity. In this episode, I bare it all, sharing my struggles and victories, offering nuggets of wisdom for anyone wrestling with trust issues in relationships, with themselves, and in life.

This episode is for you if: 

• You've been blindsided by betrayal and are struggling to trust again 
• You’re tired of feeling stuck in a cycle of fear and insecurity after infidelity
• You’re having a hard time even trust yourself again, and second guessing and overthinking all of your relationship decisions

Expect some candid storytelling as I reveal how self-love became my guiding light through the darkness. I'll take you on a rollercoaster ride of emotions, showing you how I emerged from the heartbreak stronger and more resilient than ever. Listen to the episode now by going to the link in my bio now.

If you've ever felt the sting of betrayal or struggled to trust again, this episode is your roadmap to healing. So grab a latte, and let's get into all there is to talk about when it comes to trust, love, and finding our way back to ourselves after infidelity. 

Let's do this. 

Are you ready to create a massive uplevel in your life and relationships? If so, use the link below to book your 90-minute Uplevel + Flow Intensive. This is a powerful 90-minute session where we go deep to energetically shift one relationship pattern you are ready to break free from, so you can magnetize more loving and supportive relationships without the chase...just flow!
https://thefemmecast.com/uplevel-and-flow-intensive

Are you ready to begin your heart healing journey today and manifest the love that you desire? If so, use the link below to register for my Uplevel + Flow Meditation Series . A 3 part series designed to help you heal from heartbreak and manifest love you've always wanted, but never thought you would find.
https://thefemmecast.ck.page/meditations

Are you ready to rewrite your love story + glow from the inside out as you become a magnet for the love you've always known you deserved? If so, use the link below to register for my 21 Day Radical Self-Love Challenge.
https://thefemmecast.ck.page/21daychallenge

Want more daily inspiration an tips on how you can uplevel your relationships and your life through the art of radical self-love? If so, use the link below to con...

Transcript

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 0:32

Hey you guys, what is up and welcome back to the show. I'm so excited and grateful to have you here. Welcome if you're new. We're diving back into life after infidelity. Today, you guys, I just wanted to wrap it up with this final episode, and that is how to rebuild trust after cheating. So that means trust in relationships, trust in yourself, trust in life.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 0:58

This was one of the biggest healing and learning obstacles that I experienced on my journey was learning to trust myself, my relationships and my life again after having sustained the heartbreak that came with infidelity. So if you've recently been cheated on or you were cheated on in the past, if you're having a really hard time trusting any partner, or you're probably even having a hard time trusting yourself and who you choose as a partner and even how life unfolds for you, then this episode is totally for you. So you're gonna wanna stick around. Not only could I not trust any man that I met and anyone that I would meet I was so hyper vigilant about before I would trust them, like they would have to jump through hoops to prove to me that I could trust them before I would trust them that all came down to the fact that I could not trust myself to choose the right partner. I could not trust my internal guidance. I could not trust my intuition, which left me feeling completely disempowered. So a lot of what we're gonna talk about today is how I sort of worked through those challenges and learned to really distrust myself again, okay. So this is gonna be super healing for you. If you've ever been in a situation like this and you know. If you are going through this right now, my heart goes out to you like I give you a big cyber hug. I know how painful it is. I know how it could rock your foundation, especially when you're really just not expecting it and just get like sideswiped by it. But you know what You've survived this. You've survived worse. You'll get through this too okay, that's all I have to say to you and you'll be better and stronger for it on the other side. So hang in there.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 2:46

I remember when this happened to me. You know some of the thoughts that were going through my head and what I was feeling was how could I ever trust anyone again when the man that I would trust with my life literally, I would put my life in his hands could do this to me and then lie to me about it so unapologetically and gas like me for even thinking it right, and then have me thinking that I was the crazy one. How could I ever trust not only another man, but how could I ever trust my choices again, having been so wrong about this person, like? I was blindsided by this, you know. So it totally rocked my belief in men, my belief in myself, even my belief in life, because I really, I truly believed like, hey, I'm a good person. All I've ever wanted was a happily ever after. Why did it have to turn out like this and I put so much trust and faith into that relationship for being my happily ever after. How can I ever trust in life again, like, if this is what it's gonna throw at me? I never wanted to endure that pain again, so why would I risk trusting anyone or anything ever again? Right, and that's really where my mindset was, and it took a lot, like I said, it took a lot of work to help me to get through that.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 4:17

I needed, you know, in order to be in a relationship. I needed people to jump through hoops of fire to prove to me again and again and again that I could trust them before I had an even real reason not to trust them. Right, and they would almost always fail because no one's gonna jump through hoops like that. So, you know, I would almost always assume that I couldn't. In many circumstances I really couldn't, and I picked up on it. But however, that side, you know, even if he was a good, decent guy, I would still have a hard time trusting him. You know, even now, like years later, trying to like navigate. You know, being back in relationship again, like it is, it's hard, it's hard, it still like plays on you sometimes and you still have to kind of catch yourself and the thought and, you know, choose a different thought, right?

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 5:11

So anyway, I was so hyper vigilant, I was overthinking, I was over analyzing, because not only could I trust a man, like I said, but the difficult part was also that I could no longer trust myself. So I was second guessing all of my decisions, all my intuitions completely. Can you just, can I just, like you know, point out here do you know how much energy this took, all this constant thinking, obsessing, worrying, analyzing? Do you have any idea Like I probably could have built Rome in a day if I had this energy back that I was spending with all this over analyzing and overthinking. That is a little nugget for a future episode, but just, oops, sorry, hold on to that for a second.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 5:55

So I had become hyper vigilant, I had become very clingy, I had become needy, always trying to like you know, like I'm making claw hands, like sink my claws in and lock in a relationship before they had the chance to like, hurt me and like that they constantly needing that external validation that the relationship was safe, that there was no one else, that I was the only one like I was constantly clinging and needing this validation. So you know, obviously, whenever we cling, whenever we get needy, whenever we get, so you know, in our own thought patterns, nothing good can come from the situation. All my relationships quickly, very quickly, turn toxic. In fact, I was inviting in, I was a bus stop for the express route to toxicity, toxic relationships. Okay, I was suffocating them and I was trying, like I said, I was trying to lock them down quickly. I was constantly second guessing, fearing, expecting the worst, believing the worst, constantly looking for them to reaffirm that it wasn't gonna you know that wasn't the case but then always believing it anyway. It was just crazy. It was just a very crazy period in my life. But, like I said to my defense, this was my douche baguera. So they probably were. And hey, you know what? That's probably where my belief was right and that's why I kept attracting it, because I kept believing if that guy would cheat on me, they'll all cheat on me. And guess what was happening? They were all cheating on me, but whatever.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 7:40

So at that point I really just started to repel relationships. They were riddled with fear and lock and negative beliefs and I was drowning in anxiety just trying to be in one. So who would want to be there? It felt like the most unsafe place in the world for me to be in a relationship. So of course, I started to repel them, and this was my experience for a few years, and it was a huge struggle. It was so painful. I went through so much heartbreak Most of it, by the way, caused by me, because I was either dating the wrong guy or going back to the wrong guy or trying to make it work with the wrong guy. You think I would have learned my lesson, but it took a long time.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 8:26

Anyway, all that to say, I reached a point where I was just done. I was in dating and analyzing and overthinking burnout and I just wanted no part of seeking and chasing and validating and trying to make things work. When I knew that deep down there was such a big part of me that didn't believe in it anymore. I knew I needed to build myself back up again. I don't think I realized at this point it was the trust in myself that I needed to work on more than anything else in the world. But again, I also needed to work on trust in other relationships and trust in life. But the biggest one, I think, was the trust within myself. But I knew I needed to do a lot of work and I knew I needed a timeout and I knew I was exhausted and I knew I was burnt out. So this is when I went on that seven-year relationship hiatus.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 9:24

So in the next seven years, so much evolved and transpired and so much healing. But I realized way, way long later. So I'm going to try and collapse the timeline for you by sharing this right. This is why I share these things. It took me seven years. It doesn't have to take you that long, right? Just listen to my podcast.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 9:45

I needed to do the inner work to trust life, to trust relationships and to trust myself again, and I needed to really start to be honest with myself about what I had been through and what I had experienced and stop trying to just attach to the next secure thing that was going to make me feel safe and lovable again. Right, and it's work that's taken so much time. I would say it's still a work in progress because I've done a lot of the healing. I've done a lot of the mindset work, but I'm still anchoring it into reality. It's still a bit wobbly, but I've managed to put a lot of my fears and anxieties at ease. Yeah, I still, like I said, I still wobble every now and then, but it's not like it used to be right. For the most part, I'm pretty chill. I can come back to my foundational beliefs, which are I am worthy of love and, no matter what, life is always working out in my favor, even if it doesn't seem or feel like it at the time. But, like I said, I still get that little twitch in my tummy from time to time that sends my alarms going off. But I talk myself off the ledge and, yes, it's a bit of intuition, but it's also some logic and the two paired together are very powerful.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 11:17

My approach to healing from this experience was very much a three-pronged approach. One, healing my trust within relationships. So if you're in this, if you're in this situation right now, you either need to either heal the trust and the relationship with your partner where the infidelity happened, like if this is you and you're trying to make it work, you're going to have to rebuild that trust again, or just rebuild your trust in relationships in general. That's number one. Number two you have to rebuild the trust back in yourself again. And then number three is you have to rebuild your trust back in life that it is always working for you and I think that was the hardest pill of all to swallow, to be honest, but anyway. So let's talk about this. So let's say you're you, you're having this experience right, so you want to heal the relationships or the trust that you have in your relationships. Let's talk about you know if you're staying with the exact same partner and you're trying to make it work.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 12:24

Ladies, there's no shortcut around this. This is gonna take a lot of open communication, uncomfortable as fuck conversations. You need to get really honest with how you're feeling. You need to pay very close attention to how your partner's feeling okay. If, like I mentioned in the last episode, right, how do you know if you should stay or go? If you're both making an earnest effort to do the healing right, to have the conversations, to be brutally honest with each other, even if it's a little bit uncomfortable at first and maybe a little bit hurtful, if you're willing to go through all that, if you're willing to go through the trenches together and make it work, then do it. You know, by all means, do it. You probably come out stronger and better on the other side of this than you were before. You may even learn a few things about yourself that may have kind of contributed at least to the co-creation of the experience, right, whether it was a limiting belief or a fear that you had, a fear of abandonment, fear of rejection, whatever but you have to both commit to doing the work, having the uncomfortable conversations, being brutally honest, getting the external support that you need in order to navigate.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 13:37

You know this very emotionally trying time and it is emotionally trying. You are gonna need some support and both parties have to be willing not only to show up for that support but to actually show up and be present. Right, I've seen a lot of partners do this, where they say yeah, yeah, okay, fine, I'll go to couples counseling and then they just slop on the sofa and be like, well, you know, we should maybe come. You know it can't be like that, like both parties have to participate in the building back of the relationship. This is what mature relationships are all about. We have uncomfortable as fuck conversations. We come to the table, we roll up our sleeves, we do what we have to do. We fucking make them work. Okay, if they're not willing to do that with you, right, and it may be imperfect and it may be sloppy and don't you know.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 14:23

Give time and space. Not everybody is at the same, can run at the same speed when it comes to personal development, right and support, so be fair. But if you see an earnest effort, then go with it. But it is gonna take, like I said, a shit ton of communication, a shit ton of honest conversations and sharing uncomfortable feelings, right, and thoughts and experiences, and we really just not only need to be comfortable expressing ourselves honestly and vulnerably, we also need to be willing to listen, even when it's really fucking uncomfortable to do it okay and cry, scream into a pillow. Do what you need to do to get those emotions out and ask for what you need right in terms of comfort, in terms of rebuilding that trust, creating that safe space. Maybe you will need a lot of reassurance, right, verbally, emotionally, physically, that the relationship is safe and that's okay. It's okay to ask for that right. It is okay to ask for that when you need it in order, when you're in that healing journey. And you know, seek that out not only in your partner but also in your other relationships, maybe in your friendships, maybe through a therapist. You know, make sure that you have the what's it called the encouragement around you to really just feel safe again, right, and feel at ease and be able to share what it is you're going through.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 16:02

Now that's not to say we should. You know I'm a firm believer in speaking our truth and sharing our challenges with the people closest to us. But you know I am someone who rarely ever talks to the people around me. I'll be flat out honest. I probably talk to you guys more than I talk to the people around me about what's going on, but I do talk to coaches and healers and therapists whenever I need to. I am like unapologetic about that and that work and that is typically who I like to share with, and I'll tell you why. Number one I don't believe that. I believe that when we're talking about what we're experiencing, I believe that we should talk about it as a share and not as a dump. And sometimes, you know, when you're talking to people close to you and kind of feel like you're dumping your problems on them and not just sharing your problems with them, and I never want to do that because that's never healthy. You know, our problems are not anybody else's problems to fix. Yes, they can hold space, they can lend an ear, but you know also, number two I always want an unbiased opinion. You know, those who love us God bless them will always have a biased opinion about what they think we should or should not do right, based on their own experience, based on their beliefs, based on their own fears. I want an unbiased ear and that is something that has proven to be so powerful for me again and again, and again. So that's been my approach, okay, that's.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 17:29

And for many of us, like, as we get older, it is hard to find those like, really like, you know, as you know oh, my God, what was the name of that movie and of Green Gables would call it like a bosom buddy, right? We just it's really hard to come by. As you get older. A lot of my closest friends are, you know, either not don't live close to me or they're online or whatever. But you know, you find, you find you find, you find, you find you have friendships. You have close friendships, but there's not. That friendship that we knew growing up sometimes is very hard to capture in our adult life. So sometimes we just don't have that person we can share everything with, and so that's why speaking to a coach or a therapist or a healer who's got experience in this area can be so valuable.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 18:14

Okay, now I want to talk about the scenario where you're not trying to make it work with the current partner or the partner or the partner who did the cheating, and you're just trying to trust in other relationships in general. So we're going to come back to that, but before we talk about that, I want to skip forward to the second and third phase, right? So the second is rebuilding your trust in yourself. This is going to take some work and this really needs to be done before you get out there again and start dating. Okay, mark my words you do not want to go out there dating until you've rebuilt the trust back in yourself.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 18:53

I did this a number of ways. So, number one you know, I took a really good hard look at the events leading up to the infidelity. I even took a good hard look at the events leading up to even getting involved in this relationship in the first place. Okay, and I had to get brutally honest with myself and I had to say to myself self were there any red flags? Did we miss something here? And you know what there were. There were red flags. There were very, very obvious red flags in the beginning and I brushed them under the rug. I brushed them under the rug because I wanted to believe wholeheartedly that this was the relationship, was my happily ever after, and I did not want to see those red flags. I wanted to just print oh, it's nothing so insignificant Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm telling you, when there's red flags there, pay attention, because they will come up again.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 19:57

And for every time I saw a red flag, I felt a little bit of a twitch and I was like okay, now I know, you know, if you don't know, now you know, okay. So you know, I was like okay, so my intuition was spot on, I just didn't want to believe it. Okay, that's step one. Okay, why didn't I want to believe it? I didn't want to believe it because I really wanted to lock down this relationship. I really wanted it to be my happy ending, I really wanted to believe that this one got to be the forever story. And so it was easy to push those red flags under the rug and try to ignore them. You know, even though they were there, and even in the months leading up to the infidelity, the signs were there, but I was like oblivious to it, because I was like just blindly believing in this happy ending without connecting to what my intuition was trying to tell me, which was something is wrong. Okay, so, in actuality, I could trust myself, but there was still the what do you call it? There was still the underlying, but I still can't trust myself. Because why did I ignore the red flags? Right? Why did I do that? Why would I do that to myself? Because I needed to believe that I was worthy of love. Okay, so that was the next phase of my work.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 21:36

The next phase of my work was really and this is, you know a longer conversation. Listen to my entire podcast if this is something that you want to work on right now, because that's all we talk about. I really needed to learn to love myself again and believe that I was worthy of a loving and committed relationship. I also needed to believe that if this did happen again, I would be okay. And in that moment, back then, I didn't believe that. I thought the pain would kill me. I thought I survived by like a miracle, you know, and that's how painful it was.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 22:15

But now I'm stronger. I've learned more. I've learned to love myself more. I have, you know, invested in myself in the areas of my life that matter most to me. So I've built a strong foundation, and I know that if I were to ever go through something like that again, fuck yeah, it would suck, but I'll be just fine. I'll be just fine. And a lot of that comes from building a solid foundation within yourself, within the belief in yourself, within confidence in yourself, and knowing that, no matter what life will throw at you, you got this, get it. So focus on that before you go out there. And then the next thing which that leads into is the third thing that you want to. You know, rebuild trust in again is life, and this is so simple, but it's not simple in the moment. I firmly believe that life is always working for us.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 23:11

Okay, and if I dissect the experience of what I went through at that time, I had a belief that I wasn't good enough and I had a fear of being abandoned and rejected and not being chosen or being passed up for someone else. Right, and that was in me from like for as long as I can remember, even though I didn't act like it, and I tried to fake confident my way. Fake confidence my way out of it, if that's a proper way of saying it. But you know what I'm trying to say? Right, I was a poster child. Fake confidence, okay, deep down, this is how I really felt and believed about myself. And so this experience for me, when they say life is always working for your highest good, it always is, even if it sucks.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 24:00

I needed to go through this experience. I needed to go through this experience as a wake up call so that I would realize that I needed to work on loving myself. I needed to work on believing that I was good enough for the happily ever after I always wanted. I needed to believe in myself enough to know that if it doesn't work out I'll be just fucking fine, because I built a solid foundation for myself. I needed to trust that whatever life threw at me, it was for my highest good, even if it didn't feel like that at the time. And I could not get there until I rebuilt the trust and the belief in myself again and could look at it from an object and could look at life and what happened to me from an unbiased perspective of how did this really serve me? If I hadn't gone through this fucking experience, you wouldn't be listening to me right now. I never would have started this fucking podcast. It literally like handed to me my life purpose and so for that fuck, yeah, I would do it all over again.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 27:41

I was actually in the comments with on the Call Her Daddy podcast. She had just posted how she had started Call Her Daddy. You guys know I love this podcast. I'm obsessed. Obsessed with this podcast. She had started the podcast back I don't know how many years ago. She was in Texas. She had gone there to see some guy who, when she got there, totally ghosted her and disrespected her, and then she went on a rampage and started Call Her Daddy.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 28:09

That's the Cliff Notes version of the story, but nonetheless, right, and I remember I posted in the comments through their fuckery we Rise. And it's so true, right, it is so true. Through that experience I gained so much from it. It has opened up my life and my world, so it is the best thing that could have happened to me. So ask me now if I trust life to work for me and in my favor. Fuck, yeah, I do, because that was everything that I needed. So, thank you, douche bag number I can't remember what number he was five. Thank you, douche bag number five, for helping me create my best life. I love you. I thank you. Please don't do it to the next gal, but hey, thank you for doing it to me and that's what helped me rebuild my trust in life again. So that had to come first.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 29:04

So again, first, if you are trying to work it with your partner, do all these three simultaneously. If you are trying to get out there and meet someone new and come up with, find your new happily ever after, then do absolutely focus on rebuilding the trust in yourself first. Focus on and even I would say, look at the partner that you experienced? Right. Look at the partner that you had the experience with. What was you know? What were the signs there? Right, rebuild that trust in yourself again Really. Look at that. Rebuild the trust in life again. Right, and really get there.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 29:44

And then, once that's done, then go back and start to rebuild the trust in relationships, because rebuilding the trust in yourself and rebuilding the trust back in life is what's going to help you have trust in your relationships right. Now you can trust your intuition. Now you can trust in life to always be working for you. And now you can feel safe, being vulnerable with the next said potential, happily ever after, and being really honest and saying listen, here's my story, right, and this is what I've done and I can attest to this firsthand. Here's my story. I have been cheated on. It was extremely painful. It was an awful experience. I've taken the time out to heal myself and do the work so that I'm no longer perpetuating those patterns in my experience.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 30:36

Do I think you're fucking, amazing and loving and all these amazing things, absolutely? Does the fear still get to me sometimes? Yes, it does. Is it because I don't trust you or I think you're a good person, or because I'm jealous of other women and I feel threatened by them. No, it has nothing to do with that. It has everything to do with I did this before. This hurt last time. I never want to feel that hurt again. It's the equivalent of a child burning their hand on the stove and then being afraid to touch the stove for the rest of their lives.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 31:10

Okay, it's just women who are out, the STAR women out there, who are jealous of other women and that you know what. Even for them, my heart goes out to them, because it really just means that they just don't feel good enough in themselves. Otherwise they wouldn't be that way. Okay, but when a woman is hyper-vigilant over her man, like looking at other women or giving attention to other women or other women texting him, yeah, you know she could struggle with some jealousy and some insecurity, sure, yeah, but which I said even that, you know I send my love and my heart out to those women, because that's not a fun place to be either. But for the most part, she's not a jealous woman. She's just a woman who has been burnt and just doesn't want to get burnt again. That is her worst, literally. Her worst fear is getting burnt like that again, okay. So you have to recognize that in yourself. You have to recognize that you have that fear. You have to be honest with your partner that you have that fear and that this is where it comes from.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 32:10

This is what I experienced, and it was very painful and I honestly didn't think I would survive. But I did. I did the work, and so here we are now. Fresh start. This is me. Take it or leave it.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 32:23

I will probably, you know, get triggered every now and then. But my commitment to you is I will do everything in my power to manage my triggers. I will look at them, I will self-reflect, I will journal, I will cry, I will scream into a pillow. There are going to be times where I'm going to need to talk to you. I'm going to try and talk to you as calmly as possible. I'm going to try not to project my shit onto you. I'm going to fuck it up sometimes. Are you in?

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 32:47

And if he's in, you got yourself a partner who's willing to do the work with you, because I do believe that, when you know, it's never our partner's responsibility to do the healing for us or to hold, you know, or to hold our issues for us. But, you know, a loving companion and partner in life will happily hold space for you to evolve. And that's really the difference, right, it's about holding space for you to evolve, being patient and being maybe just a little bit more. You know, understanding, and I would not have this conversation on date one maybe go through like date this guy for like a month or two, three months, see if he's really the real thing, right, see if he's really into a committed relationship and really wanting to make things work with you, and then, before you solidify anything, just say, hey, really into this, right, things going, great. Something you should know because this could come up to bite us in the end. But and I just want you to know what you're, what you know, what, to know what to expect, right, and to know what I'm, where I'm thinking and what where I'm at.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 33:56

Any self-respecting partner who wants to be in a committed relationship with you and who's really into you will, you know, be patient and be understanding with you. And they may not do this perfectly. They'll probably fuck up and you'll probably fuck up, and everybody gets to fuck up. It's okay. That's what relationships are. We fuck them up all the time. The point is, we come back together and we do what we have to do in order to make it work. And until you meet that kind of partner, you know, unless you are looking to to entertain casual relationships, right, which I'm guessing if you're here, you're probably not.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 34:36

So if you are looking to establish your next happily ever after scenario, do not do not what's it called? Take your time deciding who that happily ever after is going to be with. Don't just rush in. Take time, let it build, learn, let this person show you who they really are, what they believe and how they feel about you and what they want in life. Right, if what they want. If they're not 100% like yes, I want a relationship, I'm interested to see. If you're that person, I really want to find out, because I really think that you could be that person. That to me is, oh, music to my ears. Yeah, let's go find out. If we're, like you know, happily ever after material together, you know. But if they're saying, yeah, I want a relationship, one day, maybe when I find the right girl, or I really like you, but I just not ready to get into, no, walk away, bye, okay, you know what you want.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 35:41

Don't settle for loss and only open yourself up vulnerably when there is. I'm not going to say don't be honest and be vulnerable with every. You should always be your most authentic self. I should never. You know, I'm never telling you to pretend to be something that you're not, but I am telling you to be a little bit. What's the word? Oh? Tip of my tongue. Hold on, I got to pause this now Discerning about who you share your most intimate details with.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 36:14

You know you don't have to share your most intimate details with everybody. There are levels of what you share and with whom. Right, some people get high access, some people get minimum medium, some people get very little access and people get no access at all, and that is okay. That is part of self care. Is learning who you can be vulnerable with and share really vulnerable things with, and who you can't, okay, absolutely mandatory when it comes to self care? Okay, so that is it for today.

MARIA @THEFEMMECAST: 36:43

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